It’s been a while since I have had a chance to write a blog about life as I experience it. Chloe and I had to move out of our apartment, the relocation trial FINALLY arrived, softball games and her 9th birthday happened all at once, or so it seems.
It is very clear to me that after actually accomplishing all of these things, how terrific single parents can be! I was overwhelmed, inundated and since we have been forced to remain in limbo for so long, scared. I frankly was at a point that I broke down and cried several times. I really didn’t think I could do all of this on my own. I am grateful to the few that were able to help with the move and such. I also started two NEW jobs and have hopes that this will help alleviate some of our legal fees, moving needs, storage, life and hopeful for some fun too this summer.
However, in saying that, those jobs are taking away from my practical business sense and yet filling the immediate needs of life. I am walking on a tight rope and have two choices, keep looking forward or look down. Right now, I am just going to keep looking forward. Yes, I am stressed and yes I am exhausted because I am having a terrible time sleeping and juggling so much. In saying that, I know that at the end of this lesson, I will have learned so much more about me and my abilities.
I love my daughter and find that she is the most terrific 9 year old! Of course, I have my bias about her but she is a terrific Kid and I think this situation will allow her the courage and strength to make better choices in life than I did. I think she will be more equipped than I was to go for her dreams first and the rest later. She is a determined and stubborn child. Of course I am not sure WHERE she gets that from –ahem- but this will help her stay focused on her goals. I have always wanted her to have more than I ever did and I think at this point she does. I think certain people in her life underestimate her and her maturity. This too will be made clear as she gets older.
So, the fight will continue for our relocation.
As I write this, I am sitting in a cozy spot in Portsmouth,N.H. that I love to clear my head at. The water ripples in the full sun and the breeze is humid but aggressive. The wind reminds me of the times that major storms would enter the shore lands of our various residences in Florida. Maybe a nice rain storm will come and take the humidity out of the air. I enjoy the few times a week that I get to have a moment to clear my mind, refocus and readjust my thinking. Its hard when so much comes at once to take the time and reorganize your thoughts. However, if you don’t then you will attract more things you don’t want and well, we all know how that ends!
So, lets reorganize and keep moving forward! We will be successful, soon.
ONWARD we go!!
………..until NEXT time……